Sunday, December 14, 2008

The Day the Earth Stood Still 2008

Well, this movie was just plain old amazing. If your someone that loves sci-fi almost end of the world movies I would definitely suggest this movie to you. This movie was so good through and through I'll leave the intense beginning for you to find out. One thing I will comment on though through-out the entire move I was getting a major green vibe, you'll know what I mean when you see it.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Neon Genesis Evangelion Reviewed

recently I got sucked up in the anime series Neon Genesis Evangelion. The anime kinda just drops you off, not really informing you about a whole lot. You follow the life of Shinji Ikari, who has recently been summoned by his father, Gendo Ikari. Immediately you can tell that the relationship between Shinji and his father is not a happy one. Shinji has no idea why his father has summoned him to Tokyo-3, a militaristic city with a hidden government research/military instillation (Nerv) buried deep beneath it, but when he arrives sirens wail and a giant humanoid creature, later intoduced as the 3rd Angel Sachiel, comes into view causing destruction and chaos. Shinji is taken deep into the government compound of Nerv to discover that his father wants him to pilot an almost Gundam looking thing called Eva Unit-01 (short for Evangelion). At first Shinji refuses to pilot it but when he sees the replacement pilot, Rei Ayanami, all beat up and wounded, he takes sympathy for her and takes the job.
Without any previous training it's kinda obvious that things aren't going to go good. Once Shingi is placed inside the Eva he is launched to the surface to face the 3rd Angel. The second he takes his first step in the Eva he trips and falls. In a second the Angel is on him beating him to a pulp, things look hopeless, command central is unable to eject Shinji from the Eva and he's not moving. All readings show that Shinji is either unconscious or dead then things get weird, the Eva starts fighting back. Before you know it Unit-1 is ripping the Angel apart, in seconds the Angel is dead and Unit-1 collapses, badly damaged.
The rest of the anime continues pretty much the same way. I felt that the episodes didn't have enough body to them, they sorta started and ended without really getting the watcher into them. Also, near the end of the series things start to get really weird. Although there were some things that bothered me I think overall I liked Neon Genesis Evangelion and would suggest it to anyone who is a fan of those animes with giant robot battles.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Demon Envy by Erin Lynn

Kenzie thinks her life is pretty hard but normal. She's failed her Driver's Test, she has annoying siblings, parents who don't understand her, and a crush on a guy who doesn't seem to know she exists, despite the fact they are lab partners. Then one morning all hell breaks lose. Well, part of Hell at least. Turns out there's a portal to the demonic prison system right under Kenzie's bathroom, and dropping her zit cream down the shower drain opens up said portal. Next thing Kenzie knows, there's an escaped demon prisoner in her bathroom, and he won't leave. Levi is an Envy demon, who looks like a geeky teenage boy, and had been imprisoned for being undemonic. Now Kenzie has a snarky demon taking over her life, a portal to Hell that keeps attacking her in the shower, and some unexpected attention is suddenly coming her way.

Demon Envy is a funny quick read. It never gets very scary, despite the portal to Hell, and is rather charming for a book about demons. I'd recommend it for teens looking for a light read, or a snarky new character.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Dread Locks by Neal Shusterman

Dread Locks is the first book in Neal Shusterman's Dark Fusion triology, which are retellings of fairy tales and myths in modern times with dark twists. Dread Locks starts out as an odd version of Goldilocks and turns in to the Gorgon myths.

Parker Baer is excited to see that someone has finally moved in to the abandoned house next door, but his first meeting with Tara, the girl who lives there is rather unusual, though oddly familiar. After letting herself in to the Baer house she proceeds to help herself to breakfast, break a chair, and take a nap in Parker's bed, where the family discovers her. She's a mysterious figure with her bright blonde coils of hair that almost seem to move and the sunglasses she always wears. She soon becomes the center of attention at school, befriending the leaders of all the groups students. But before too long Parker notices that her new friends are behaving more and more oddly, such as drinking huge quanities of milk and eating dirt. From there on in, it gets creepier.

I would recommend this book for 11 or 12 year olds and up, especially for readers that enjoy creepy books but not gore. A fast read, and one that will make you shiver a little. It is a book we've had for awhile that hasn't circed as much as it deserves, so give it a try.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Bond is Back!!

Quantum of Solace was released in the USA on November 14th 2008. Of course, being an avid James Bond fan, I found myself sitting in the theater forty-five minutes early on that day. My brother and I got there early so we could get good seats, and it was wonderful.

Quantum of Solace is the twenty second Bond film made. This particular movie is sort of a sequel to the twenty first film, Casino Royale. In the movie, Bond becomes overwhelmed with revenge as he hunts down the people who are responsible for Vesper's death in Casino Royale. On his way, he finds something huge.

In my opinion, Casino Royale is a must see in order for you to enjoy this movie. If you choose not to, good luck figuring out the characters. I still think it was awesome, but there was too much action. I give it a four out of five stars!!


Monday, October 20, 2008

Long Time No Review

Ok, so its been a long-o time since I have reviewed anything. Thus the title of this blog post. :]

This review is about a movie titled "Dodge Ball". Dodge Ball was a movie I picked at random for a laugh. Starring Ben Stiller and Vince Vaughn, it was sure to deliver. The plot basically consists of a good guy, an evil guy, and a problem. 

Mega millionaire and gym owner White Goodman (Stiller), tries to buy out his only competition, Average Joe's gym which is run by Peter LaFleur (Vaughn). The only way for LaFleur to save his small gym, is to compete in a dodge ball competition for $50,000.

In the end, the bad guy loses and the good guy wins. There are a few surprises though!
i'll give it a 3 1/2 out of 5 stars. 

Friday, July 18, 2008

South of the Pumphouse by Les Claypool

Is it bad that I want to grow up to be like that guy? That guy in question is Les Claypool, one of the most creative and innovative bassists of our time, frontman of such bands as Primus, Oysterhead, Sausage, and the Fearless Flying Frog Brigade, and author of the book "South of the Pumphouse" which is, coincidentally, the book I'm reviewing! Isn't it funny the way things work out?
The book opens in the small town of El Sobrante, which was the town in which Les Claypool and Primus Guitarist Larry "Ler" LaLonde grew up. I'm sorry, I'm getting fanboyish. Anyway, the story follows the drug fueled fishing trip of brothers Ed and Earl, and Earl's bigoted best friend Donny.
I'm going to warn you now, this book is not for the prude. I am a fairly jaded child and some of the things in this book actually made me blush. There are copius amounts of drugs consumed, sex thrown out all willy-nilly (I love that word), and plenty o' violence.
Now that that I've warned you, on with the story. The book's main storyline follows the exploits of the three boys on the boat. Conversation varies wildly between the three, from debate about homosexuality, to scat in a public restroom, but it's Earls drug fueled rampage that shifts the tone of the book from lighthearted, if explicit, conversation, into an extremely morbid tone.
I loved this book. It was well written and strange, and ended on a disturbingly unsettling note. My only complaints are the flashbacks, which often intrude on the story, and the overall length of the book. Around two hundred pages, the book reads pretty quick, especially since you can't put it down. Unless you have no arms.
All in all, this book is a definite must for any fan of Claypool and his work, and a must for those who enjoy dark and unsettling tales. I'd heartily reccomend this to ay stranger passing in the street. Course, they'd all probably think I'm insane.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Loving Will Shakespeare by Carolyn Meyer

In between my James Bond and Star Wars reads i picked up this book called Loving Will Shakespeare. It seemed cute and a good off topic book, so i began to read it. Its a great book that will capture your full attention with details and makes you actually care for the main character. Her name is Agnes Hathaway. After he mother dies her father brings a new wife into the house. Agnes's Stepmother is hate full, unkind and rude, and disfavors Agnes. The book goes on through her life as a young adult and shows her struggles with finding her perfect man to marry, loosing her loved ones, and her stepmother. Its a sweet book with kind of an annoying ending, but all the same, I would recommend it to anyone with a spot for romance.
-loved it!!


Monday, June 30, 2008


WALL-E is a treat to watch. It is cute, funny, horrifying, and touching. WALL-E is the last of the robots that were left to clean up Earth while humanity went on a five year cruise. However, it has been 700 years and WALL-E hasn't come close to making Earth livable again. Enter EVE who changes WALL-E's life forever.

There is little to no dialog for the first half or so of the film, but it still manages to draw you in. WALL-E is probably one of the best movies of the year. It has wonderful characters, a good strong plot, beautiful animation and backgrounds, and it works on enough levels to keep adult sci-fi nerds interested (that would be myself included). The fate of humanity in WALL-E will hopefully make people take a look at their lives and the way we treat not only the Earth but also our own bodies. The way WALL-E lives should gives us hope and remind us to enjoy the wonder that is our world.

I gotta say that this movie had a theater full of 20 and 30 somethings on the edge of their seats and not making a sound. Go see this movie.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

The Matador

The Matador was a great movie staring Pierce Brosnan and Greg Klinnear.
This darker comedy is about two totally different men becoming friends. Julian Noble (Brosnan) is a hit man who starts to go mad, while on a job in Mexico, he meets a struggling business man named Danny (Klinnear). The two bond but part after Julian asks him to help in an assassination.
6 months later, Julian is a ruined hit man, and his boss is out to get him for screwing up. so he goes to his one and only "friend", Danny. together Danny and Julian go out and solve the problems at hand.
Its a Great movie full of quirky things and unforgettable phrases. I would highly recommend this to any Brosnan fan. Its easily one of my favorite movies!!
(recommended for 13+)


OK. SilverFin is a young James bond book. I enjoyed it as much as any other book. The main plot is about a guy who is creating and testing steroids and hes testing them in ways that seem inhumane. But when he broadens his test subjects and starts testing on people, things get out of hand. People start to disappear, and rumours start spreading. James decides that he and his pal are going to have a look around the mad man's lab which is a giant castle in Scotland. they do solve the case and get the mad man, like in most James bond related stories.
that is all.
i recommend it.

Monday, June 16, 2008

Licence to Kill (aka James Bond)

Unlike most Bond movies I've seen, this one doesn't do much for me. Yes, today i have decided to post how much i absolutely hate this movie. Basically this movie has no right whatsoever to be a Bond movie. Ok, so we'll start off with the actor Timothy Dalton. I'm not saying I knew how men were considered "steamy' in the late 80's, but this guy, Oh MY GOD! He is the worst looking man i have ever seen! personally i would like to take a razor blade to his face to make it look prettier. why? why would they hire a guy like him? hu? erg.
Another thing that drove me up the wall was how it was night, darkness created shadow for Bond to infiltrate and sneak around, but then, BAM! the lights came on and it was mid day! how on earth??
Another problem that i had was the relationship between Bond and Lupe Lamora, Sanchez's girlfriend. Near the end of the movie, they talk about the relationship they had and all the "things" they did together. Unless there was some off-camera smoochin', all the "things" they did together consisted of talking, and threatening with a knife, and perhaps some black jack.
Now i go back to Dalton. Yeah yeah i know that bond always gets the girls, but ew, who in their right mind would fall for the lack there of charm of him...
And what was up with him? he was like on his man period or something. Major attitude adjustment. while watching, I'm pretty sure i said "That's not Bond", or "The new Bond would've killed them"or"he would've shot faster" and so on.
Anyway, apart from all of those things that sucked, the movie just sucked in general. The plot was ok, the script was ok, the actors...not so much.
My favorite part would have to be the part with Q that lasted about 2 minuets.
so that's it. hope you enjoyed it! haha yeah right.

Friday, June 13, 2008

Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

The book was written by Matthew Stover, and was based off of George Lucas' screenplay. As most anything with the topic "Star Wars", this book was aw some!
It went way into detail about Anikin's feelings, and how the struggle with himself ended badly. I would defiantly recommend this book to any Star Wars fan.
Basically if you've seen the movie, you know the plot of the book.

The only thing that got me was the surprise ending! I had no idea that Anikin became Vader!!! XD
that's all!

Thursday, June 12, 2008


Suprise! This is my first review where I actually one hundred percent liked the material I'm supposed to be reviewing! YAAY! YAAAAY! *throws party* anyway, this review is of the graphic novel of Coraline.
as a big fan of Coraline the book, and just about everything else Neil Gaiman has ever done, I was exited to hear about the Coraline graphic novel. The plot is thus; Coraline finds a door in her house that leads to a wierd parallel dimension "Mirror Mirror" type thing. In it, everyone has buttons for eyes, and is required, by law, to be really, REAAALy creepy.
This is a great book, with some creepy bits and some funny ones, generally it's pretty family friendly, although there are a couple of moments probably not for the kidlings. This is a great book I'd reccomend to almost anyone. Read it! Right now.
I said NOW.

Monday, June 9, 2008

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is thoroughly, exuberantly, with out a shadow of a doubt... pretty decent. While it's no Last crusade, and certainly no Lost Ark, it comes far ahead of that affront to all that is holy, Temple of Doom (with the possible exception of Short Round, who I'm convinced is the coolest person since Jeebus himself.)

This movie that I really don't have time to spell out all the way, opens strong. The first twenty minutes are pretty cool, with some good old fashioned betrayal, and beating up commies. At this point, I was asking myself "What could possibly go wrong?" Then Shia Leboeuf shows up. My philosophy of "Never trust anyone with more than five vowels in his name" is proven correct. When he shows up, positively dripping with hair gel, the movie goes on a downward spiral for the next twenty or so minutes. Towards the last section of those twenty minutes, I was convinced that Shia was the anti-christ himself. It pains me when directors hire pretty-boy disney stars in order to draw the youth audience, especially when it involves Shia, Ashley Tissdale or Miley Cyrus, who is Satan, cleverly disguised as Hannah Montana.

But then, Marion shows up, and all is right with the cosmos.

If you're gonna see this movie, DO NOT go in thinking "Last Crusade" or "Lost Ark" You WILL be dissapointed. Instead, walk into the theatre thinking "Temple of Doom." You will be pleasently surprised.


Thursday, May 8, 2008

Prom Night... *Prolonged Sigh*

Ah, "Prom Night". So badly written, so stupid characters, so blatantly incompetent... and yet it continues to make money. How and why are not my issue, to me, it seems that this hastily compiled, rancid, piece of..... anyway, it's bad. If the opening paragraph of this review hasn't forever scared you off already, I shall explain just how not good it is.

Before we get to haw terrible this movie is, apparently a brief plot sypnosis is in order. Guy kills girls family. Later, guy tries to kill girl and all her friends at prom. That's it. Believe me, if the plot was a roller caster of thrills, chills and spills, I would be all to happy to spill my guts about the plot here, and now. No explanation is even given as to why this guy is chasing this chick. Well if you count the phrase "He was obsessed with her" said raspily a couple of times, sure.

Now, the fun; how aggresively and blatantly stupid this movie is. Take for instance: how the pshyco in question escaped the MAXIMUM SECURITY prison: he crawled out an air vent, and ran away. Barring the assumption that noone was guarding the roof, or the prison grounds, or how the guy managed to cover a thousand %$#@ing miles in one day, apparently, the designer of the prison has never seen a james bond movie in his entire life. "Oh, I'll just put large air vents that any person could easily fit through and lead directly onto the roof into all of the murderers cells." That guy was smart.

Okay, we've covered "badly written" and "incompetent." Now, onto the characters themselves. In one instance, the freaked white chick wakes up in her bed. She turns off the TV, currently playing when Harry met Sally or something similar, looks out the window and checks that the cop guarding her house is still there. Then, she heads into the bathroom to take her meds, closes the medicine cabinet, and suprise! Psyco killer (kisk-ke-say?) is there, who promptly and efficiently smashes her head into the mirror. She wakes up again! It was all a dream. Then, in what must have been the worst plan since Abraham Lincoln said "I'm bored, I think I'll go take in a night at the theater", she turns off the TV set to the EXACT SAME PROGRAM IT WAS ON IN HER DREAM, checks to make sure that the SAME COP IN HER DREAM is outside, goes and takes her meds EXACTLY %&*$ING LIKE HOW SHE DID IN HER DREAM, and suh-PRISE! GUESS WHAT HAPPENS!?

This movie made me ill. Not slightly-vomity ill, but facing-potentially-lethal-fits-of-gastro-intestinal-unhappiness-the-pain-OH-HOLY-GOD-THE-PAIN!!! ill. My bet is, unless you enjoy watching everything you hold dear to you effortlessly slain in one single ninety minute period, go right ahead. Sarcastyx signing off.

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

The Forbidden Kingdom

"The Forbidden Kingdom" Is a very strange movie, starring Jackie Chan and Jet Li, and some white kid whos name has slipped my mind. It's entertaining, ertainly, but don't go expecting a level of dialouge to rival King Lear. The basic plot is, the white guy mentioned above finds a staff in an old man's chinese pawn shop. He is beaten up by some inner-city "Grease rejects" and forced to rob the old man. The old man is shot, and his last words are for the white kid to give the staff back to the owner.

Then, he like...falls through the ground... and there's this... monkey guy and a girl
Eh, it's not like it matters. "The Forbidden Kingdom" is a ver "Is what it is" movie, which, quite frankly, chucks plot out the window the second you see Jackie beating the crap out of a soldier- on a horse. The movie carries on, and Jet li as a monk shows up. In one of the highlights of the film, Jackie and Jet (Alliterations are fun) beat the $#%@ out of one another, as only they can. It culminates in a special-effects heavy final battle between evil-bearded-dude and the monkey guy. You'll be fairly bored during the sequences when someone isn't kicking another person, but, thankfully, thats about six-and-a-half minutes out of the two hour movie.

"Forbidden Kingdom" Is certainly worth watching if you like action, or if you like the coming of age story of a badly portrayed white guy. I'm betting it's the former.

Saturday, May 3, 2008

Prey by Lurlene McDaniel

Ok so I just finished this book called Prey. Its about this boy named Ryan and his relationship with a young teacher. Throughout the book you jump from the prespective of Ryan, Lori Settles (the teacher) and Honey (Ryans best friend). When Ryan starts seeing Lori, problems start with his friends, and grades drop. plus hes got this prying dad who travels all the time. it was a good book, and i would recomend it to anyone over 13 :]

ps: this is my 1st book review so bear with me. YaY

Friday, May 2, 2008

Unwind by Neal Shusterman

The Second Civil War, also known as "The Heartland War," was a long and bloody conflict fought over a single issue. To end the war, a set of constitutional amendments known as "The Bill of Life" was passed. It satisfied both the Pro-Life and the Pro-Choice armies. The Bill of Life states that human life may not be touched from the moment of conception until a child reaches the age of thirteen. however, between the ages of 13 and 18, a parent my choose to retroactively "abort" a child.... on the condition that the children's life doesn't "technically" end. The process by which a child is both terminated and yet kept alive is called "unwinding".

Follow the paths of three very different teenagers scheduled for unwinding as they make a desperate journey across American in an attempt to stay in one piece until their 18th birthdays. This book is exciting. It is thought provoking. It is a story about kids being used by a society hungry for body parts for quick and easy medical replacements and makes you question not just where life begins, but where it ends (if every part of you is exisiting "alive" in someone else, what has happened to your soul?) Read this book if you liked the "Pretties" trilogy or "The House of the Scorpion" by Nancy Farmer, or if you are just looking for an exciting read that also gives you something to think about.

Friday, April 25, 2008

Not the End of the World

I'm going to kick things off here with a quick review of my own.

"Not the End of the World" by Geraldine McCaughrean
This book theorizes what life would have been like on the Ark, and is told largely through the eyes of Noah's daughter, Timna (no daughter was mentioned in the Bible). It is realistic, sparing no details of grim and horrors of the flood and spending more than a month in a large boat with a zoo's worth of animals. The first days involve Noah's family dealing with the swimming survivors who are trying to get on board. It is ultimately a book about understanding God and His will. Does he speak to and work through only Noah, or does Timna have some part of the great plan as well.

This is a book that was very hard to put down. Short chapters and lots action keep it fast paced, and I just had to know what was going to happen next. I definitely recommend this book. 4 out of 5 stars.

-Ms. G